Sharon Fernandez a child of God , worship leader , Wife , mother, a women after God`s own heart. She lives in the city of Singapore. Born to a Indian mom and Chines Dad, she is multilingual and cultural. She found purpose in living for God and serves God fulltime. She believes there is nothing God cannot do for those who trust in Him. Follow her on her blog

When the marriage becomes a marriage of purpose, we need Jesus, acknowledging that the marriage is more than a man and a woman who is in love say i do in the alter, it is also a covenant made by and with God. Marriage is not possible to last without God in it! We are living in a fallen world, surrounded by broken people carrying tons of baggage of hurts, anger, grudges, unforgiveness,self centered mind-set around. We are talking about staying in love with the same person till we are called Home to dwell with the Lord forever.
​ ( Notice, i didn’t say till death do us apart. With The lord being the 3rd party, i refused to believe love is till death when its for eternity).

Wives, this is nothing but the truth! We are not going to be the center of everything the men do in their live!
They wont be able to give us their 100% attention like they used to during those dating days. They wont be saying the right things or doing the right things to make us feel happy or special all the time. They need our help to pray for them. We need to help ourselves by praying too!

When i say pray for them, i am not saying we tag team with God and go against them. That isn’t going to happen!
Allow me to explain the real definition of the power of being a praying wife. It is not a means of gaining control over the husband, so let us not get our hopes up there! In fact, it is quite the opposition. It’s relying on God’s supernatural power to transform you( the wife), your husband, your circumstances and your marriage. The power bestowed upon every praying wife isn’t given to wield like a weapon in order to beat back an unruly beast. In Stormie’s words It is a gentle tool of restoration appropriated through the prayers of a wife who longs to do right more than be right, and to give life more than get even. It’s a way to invite God’s power into your husband’s life for his greatest blessing,which is ultimately yours too. 

No one can fully comprehend what happens behind those closed doors better than you, your husband and God ( the silent party listening to every single conversation that takes place between you)  Over the years, i have tried all sort of methods just to get my husband’s attention, even make him do things for me. Every time  an argument occurs, i would either be so quick to shoosh him or i would give the cold shoulder ( Silent treatment), Avoided talking, confronting, debating. Even using my tears as a weapon to make him feel guilty that he has hurt me. It took sometime to realize that praying first, these unpleasant methods of operation could be avoided.

If you are still with me reading this blog, it simply means, you want to make your marriage work, You are desiring to have a happy and peace orientated home. You are willing to accept the 3 word prayer is going to be Lord Change Me not Change Him Lord.

This blog isn’t a testimony to my own works but purely the miraculous works of our good lord. His Faithfulness in sustaining our marriage.
Truth is i haven’t started praying for my husband until i started praying for my daughter. A husband can hurt your feelings, be inconsiderate, uncaring, abusive verbally or emotionally for some it may even result to physical abuse. He can say or do anything that pierce your heart like a silver. It is truth you can’t give yourself to pray for him, you find the silver festering. Obviously, you can’t bring yourself to praying the way God wants you to until you get rid of it.
Praying for husband isn’t the same as praying for children. We have authority over children as their mother. We don’t have authority over our husbands.
However, we do have authority over the all the power of the enemy ( Luke 10:19) and pray against the assignments the enemy have upon you and your husband and the marriage. All we got to do is get on our knees and pray against it.
Many difficult complicated things that happens in a marriage relationship are actually part of the enemy’s plan set up for its demise.
We can take a strong stand against any negative influences in our marriage relationship and know that God has given us authority in His name to back it up. Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven ( Matthew 18:18). 
You have the authority in the name of Jesus to stop the evil and permit Good. You can submit to God in prayer whatever controls your husband. – Alcoholism, workaholism,laziness,depression,infirmity,abusiveness,anxiety,fear or failure.

Holy spirit unites husband and wife and gives added power to their prayers. They are a team, one unit, unified in spirit.
Imagine praying for the right side of the body and leave the left side out? The left side will pull down the right side and fall.
This oneness is what gets on the nerve of the enemy, that’s why he devises ways to weaken this unity. He gives us whatever we will fall for, bowing to our own selfish desires, pride, low self-esteem, insecurities. Temptations comes in various forms, the weaker one may succumb. When he speaks lies into you, its like you are hearing your own voice speaking to you. ” Nothing will ever change, it is in his dna, this marriage is beyond repair and nothing will help. I rather be happy with someone else, he be happier with someone else.” These are lies! Stop paying attention to such thoughts! Rebuke them by speaking the living word of God into them!
Jesus came to save, the enemy is there to steal, destroy and kill!
Jesus is able to change everything! Breathe life into every area of your marriage.
Join me as we pray one prayer at a time. While we pray, i urge you to be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal.

Psalm 107:19-20
They cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them out of their distresses. He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions. 

Father God, i ask and pray in Jesus name, for you to work in me first. Yes lord, Help me to be a good wife. Not because my husband deserve it, because you have called me to be a good wife. I fully realize that i dont have what it takes to be one without Your help.
Take my selfishness,impatience and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things.
Take my old emotional habits, mindsets,automatic reactions,rude assumptions, and self- protectiveness, and make me patient,kind,good,faithful,gentle, and self controlled.
Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with YOur battering ram of revelation. Give me a new heart and work in me Your love,peace and joy ( Galatians 5:22,23) I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment. Only You can transform me. ( Mark 11:24,25) 
Father God, you forgave me and lord help me to forgive my husband. Your word has clearly instructed us in Colossians 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
In another version it says : Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Let your will be done in my life lord. I surrender to you. Change my heart o Lord! I pray. In Jesus Name Amen!

Author : Sharon Fernandez